This is a self portrait I made as a college assignment back in 2004. It is a digital illustration made out of type. I remember having a great deal of difficulty completing this assignment. It wasn't the first assignment I had a hard time with, but I swear it was the one that garnered the most negative emotions from me.
I look at it and see a physical likeness to me. I see my dark eyes, my (formally) thick eyebrows, my pudgy nose, tight lips and fat face. What I don't see is a representation of my personality. I find that frustrating and depressing.
This was an assignment that should have been made for me. I love type. I love fonts. I collected fonts long before I went to college to become a graphic designer. I love descenders and ascenders, serfs and spurs, the curves of loops, bowls and shoulders, and the finite lines of stems and cross bars. You'd think that with such admiration for for the medium we use to to non verbally communicate with each other I would have been able to dive into this assignment and create something I could be proud of. But no.
This was an assignment that should have been made for me. I love type. I love fonts. I collected fonts long before I went to college to become a graphic designer. I love descenders and ascenders, serfs and spurs, the curves of loops, bowls and shoulders, and the finite lines of stems and cross bars. You'd think that with such admiration for for the medium we use to to non verbally communicate with each other I would have been able to dive into this assignment and create something I could be proud of. But no.
I knowe that the problem that hindered my ability to translate my likeness into an artistic representation of myself is that I lacked a true sense of self. To be honest, I don't think I know any more of who I really am today than I did back then. It's a scary thought. One that I've been facing this year. One that's changing.
Looking at the image reminds me why I have been trying to step outside my self imposed box, why I am trying to do things I don't normally do. Why, for the first time in my life I've set goals – small ones, but they count.
Looking at the image reminds me why I have been trying to step outside my self imposed box, why I am trying to do things I don't normally do. Why, for the first time in my life I've set goals – small ones, but they count.
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